FAQs regarding Mediation about a child

You can start mediation for your child by contacting a private family mediator or a family mediation service and indicate that you wish to commence a parenting mediation with your former partner. The process will start with private individual sessions between the family mediator and each participant. This is often called Intake or Pre-Mediation and is a confidential process which means the family mediator will not disclose anything discussed with other mediation participants. Following these intake sessions, the mediator will make an assessment as to whether it is safe and appropriate to continue onto a joint mediation session. The mediator will also provide information to all participants about the concept of the best interests of the child and the need for this principle to be considered in the discussions and upheld in any agreements made. The mediator may also supply information about the typical parenting matters that are discussed and documented into a parenting agreement or parenting plan during a parenting mediation. These should be considered as a guide only as there are not any prescribed or standard parenting-after-separation arrangements and each family is treated as unique with their own circumstances to sort out in a way that best suits them.

The concepts of “child custody” and “access” no longer exist in Australian family law. The Family Law Act 1975 regards both parents as having equal shared parental responsibility for the care, welfare and financial maintenance of their children until such children reach adulthood at the age of eighteen years. However, the concept of equal shared parental responsibility should not be confused with the concept of children spending equal time with both parents. Under Australian law these two concepts are not the one and the same thing, although there may, in fact, be circumstances where equal shared care is the mutually agreed and appropriate outcome for some families.

The Family Law Act 1975 is also very clear that any arrangements for children must be in the “best interests of the children” which is defined as the children having the opportunity of a significant and meaningful relationship with both parents provided it is safe to do so. If there is a conflict between meeting both aspects of that definition, then the safety of the children is always given greater weight over the relationship with the parent.

In many separated families there may be a resident parent whom the children live with for more than 50% of the time and an arrangement for the children to spend time regularly with the other parent. There are not any prescribed or standard parenting-after-separation arrangements, as each family is treated as unique with their own circumstances to sort out in a way that best suits them. Unless you can amicably and fairly work these arrangements out privately with your former partner, the next cheapest and quickest way to agree on parenting arrangements is in mediation with a registered family mediator.  These arrangements can be documented in a number of ways including a parenting agreement, a parenting plan, court consent orders or court orders. The arrangements should be appropriate for the age and developmental stage of the children and may also need to be reviewed and changed over time as the children grow and develop and their needs change as a result.

As, under Australian law, equal shared parental responsibility is assumed, separated parents need to transition to a new way of parenting that is termed co-parenting. Until your children reach adulthood you and your former partner will be their co-parents. Both co-parents retain parental responsibility and children retain the right to have a significant and meaningful relationship with both of their parents provided it is safe to do so. What all this means in a nutshell is that, in most cases, you will need to prepare yourself, that in the best interest of your child/ren, you will have shared, rather than sole care, of your child/ren with your co-parent.

You can make agreements with your co-parent about the shared cared of your children in a family mediation.

The concepts of “child custody” and “access” no longer exist in Australian family law. In many separated families there may be a resident parent whom the children live with for more than 50% of the time and an arrangement for the children to spend time regularly with the other parent. There are not any prescribed or standard parenting-after-separation arrangements, as each family is treated as unique with their own circumstances to sort out in a way that best suits them. These arrangements can be documented in a number of ways including a parenting agreement, a parenting plan, court consent orders or court orders. The arrangements should be appropriate for the age and developmental stage of the children and may also need to be reviewed and changed over time as the children grow and develop and their needs change as a result.

In an Australian Family Law (family mediation) Mediation, the role of the family mediator is to assist the participants to safely and fairly discuss the future parenting arrangements of their children with particular emphasis on giving each person the opportunity to share what is important to them and why, and to respectfully listen to the needs and perspectives of the other person. The mediator also has a duty of care to ensure that the best interests of the children are being considered in the discussions and upheld in any agreements made. The mediator will capture any agreed parenting arrangements in a parenting agreement or a parenting plan. Example of items documented in a parenting agreement or plan may include matters such as: days/nights and times that children regularly spend with both parents; details of how and when changeovers will occur; arrangements for special days such as birthdays and Christmas; education, religious and cultural attendance; dealing with medical and other emergency situations; etc.

If the matter under discussion at mediation relates to children under 18 years of age, such as agreeing upon the parenting arrangements after a separation, the children will not ever attend the mediation. There is a variation of family mediation that provides an opportunity for children to meet with a child specialist professional prior to mediation and that professional can then attend the mediation to bring the voice of the children to the discussions. Regardless of the format of the mediation, the mediator has a duty of care to ensure that the best interests of the children are being considered in the discussions and upheld in any agreements made.